Emotional Imbalance

Most of us are living this life in such a way that what happens outside affects our inside. Have you ever thought, what life would be like if this cycle was stopped. What would life be like if your inside became so strong that no matter what is happening on the outside, you are able to maintain a constant state of peace within yourself.

Guru Sahib Ji explains to us that someone who in the midst of pain, does not feel pain is known to be truly blessed.

ਜੇ ਭੁਖ ਦੇਹਿ ਤ ਇਤ ਹੀ ਰਾਜਾ ਦੁਖ ਵਿਚਿ ਸੂਖ ਮਨਾਈ II ੩ II
Even if you give me hunger, I will feel satisfied. I am joyful, even in the midst of sorrow.

-Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 757

The one major reason for any kind of emotional imbalance we experience is the unfulfillment of our desires.
As human beings, we fail to realize that this world is like a guesthouse. We are not going to be here forever, yet, we place our hopes and desires into the objects and people of this world. Maharaj explains to us that placing reliance in mortals is absolutely worthless.

ਮਾਨੁਖ ਕੀ ਟੇਕ ਬ੍ਰਿਥੀ ਸਭ ਜਾਨੁ ।।

Reliance on mortals is in vain – know this well.

-Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 281

The vicious cycle of expectations becomes never-ending if we don’t contemplate on the Guru’s Shabad. When these expectations are not met, we feel pain and anxiety.

When one places his or her hopes in the Timeless Being, one experiences true bliss. This is because Guru Sahib Ji is the only one who will never ever disappoint you in life.
He will accept you every single time you surrender to him, there is no one as compassionate as our father, Dhan Dhan Guru Gobind Singh Ji Paatshah. Sikhi teaches us to be strong, not only so that we can fight battles in the outside world but also to enable us in order to fight battles inside the mind.

ਣਾਣਾ ਰਣ ਤੇ ਸੀਝੀਐ ਆਤਮ ਜੀਤੈ ਕੋਇ ।।

Nanna: One who conquers his soul, wins the battle of life.

-Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 256

Living like a Manmukh means living according to your own self. For example, if I feel that I want to watch movies till late night, wake up at noon the next day and miss my Nitnem (daily prayer of Sikhs) then that will be called acting like a Manmukh, going in accordance with what pleases MY mind.

Living like a Gurmukh is when we face ourselves towards the Guru. We only think of what will please my Guru and not what will please MY mind. Referring to the previous example, a Gurmukh won’t give in to a worthless desire of his mind, he will sleep on time, wake up for Amritvela, and complete his Nitnem. When we live our life in accordance with the Guru’s command, we become Gurmukhs.

ਗੁਰਮੁਖਿ ਬਖਸਿ ਜਮਾਈਅਨੁ ਮਨਮੁਖੀ ਮੂਲੁ ਗਵਾਇਆ ।।

The Gurmukh grows the crop of forgiveness while the self – willed Manmukh loses even his roots.

-Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 304

When our mind is engrossed in Manmat (self-centered thoughts), our mind seems like our own enemy. Only when we colour our mind in the beautiful essence of Gurmat
(understanding of the Guru’s way), do we truly make our mind, our friend.

If we are not nourishing our soul with Gurbani on a daily basis, our soul seems like a burning soul. Ups and downs surround us and we find ourselves prey to mood swings. These mood swings are not very easy to tackle. The most effective way of tackling emotional instability is to surrender to Guru Sahib. When we surrender to Guru Sahib, nothing remains our own. Our virtues, our demerits, our worries and anxieties – none of it belongs to us anymore. We give everything to Guru Sahib and we become empty, empty to be filled with the one true love, the love for Vaheguru Ji.

ਕਬੀਰ ਮੇਰਾ ਮੁਝ ਮਹਿ ਕਿਛੁ ਨਹੀ ਜੋ ਕਿਛੁ ਹੈ ਸੋ ਤੇਰਾ ।।

Kabeer, nothing is mine within myself. Whatever there is, is Yours, O Lord.

-Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 1375

When we tell ourselves to hold on to the robe of Guru Hargobind Sahib Ji just like those 52 Rajas did, we experience true freedom. When we place all our faith in a higher power, our mind is set free of its a cycle of anxiety and fear.

Link to the Saakhi of Guru Hargobind Sahib Ji and the 52 Rajas (as referred to above) :

This is the magic of surrendering. When we surrender to Guru Sahib, our self-conceited mind no longer remains the master of our life. With utmost love and humility, we make Guru Sahib the master of our life and remove the constant sense of ‘I’ (I feel low, I feel angry, etc.). This sense of ‘I’ will stop dominating our minds once we give ourselves up to the Guru.

ਐਸਾ ਸਤਿਗੁਰੁ ਜੇ ਮਿਲੈ ਤਿਸਨੋ ਸਿਰੁ ਸਉਪੀਐ ਵਿਚਹੁ ਆਪੁ ਜਾਇ ।।

If you meet such a True Guru, offer your Head to Him; your selfishness and conceit shall be eradicated from within.

-Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 917

All pain goes away by surrendering because more often than not, we ourselves cause our own emotional imbalance. It’s up to you, how much you want to let temporary aspects of life affect yourself.

A saint doesn’t suffer emotionally, because he/she doesn’t reject what is happening in the present moment. They live in acceptance, humility, and positivity. If we too take a saint’s perspective and look at this world, we will automatically get that optimistic approach to life which will make us understand that everything happens in God’s will and hence, everything happens for the best. Even if we feel pain while facing difficult times, that too is for the best because this pain will only push us to take out time, sit and remember the Supreme Being.

ਦੁਖੁ ਦਾਰੂ ਸੁਖੁ ਰੋਗੁ ਭਇਆ ਜਾ ਸੁਖੁ ਤਾਮਿ ਨ ਹੋਈ ।।

Suffering is the medicine, and pleasure the disease because where there is pleasure, there is no desire for God.

-Guru Granth Sahib Ji, Ang 469

So let’s forget the self-centered approach we are consumed in and take on the Guru’s way of living life because the Guru has the power to not only wash away our filth but to also mend together our broken hearts.

By Harbani Kaur (Maoleyo)

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